Wasted Breath?
Last time we looked at the spiritual discipline of reading God’s Word as inhaling. This week we will briefly look at prayer as exhaling what we read in God’s word.
Prayer has been the hardest spiritual discipline to cultivate in my life. In fact, one of the fastest ways for someone to know how I am doing spiritually is to ask about the frequency and depth of my prayers.
I also know that I am not alone in this. The majority of Jesus followers that I engage with struggle more with regular prayer than with regular Bible study. Why is this? Why does it seem so common for people to struggle to pray? There are many valid answers, but these are the ones that rise to the top in my mind and the minds of those I asked before writing this—
getting distracted
depending on self
questioning if it really works
questioning if it is really necessary
not truly understanding how relationship with God works
In this brief discussion on prayer within the Christian life we will look at the foundation of our prayer, and one of the key purposes of prayer. We cannot cover every question or concern raised on this topic, but I hope to provide a few helpful and encouraging words and to point to resources where one can dig deeper.
On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand
The greatest help for my struggles in prayer came through a better understanding of a very familiar passage of Scripture. Romans 8, arguably one of the most powerful chapters of the New Testament, is full of familiar phrases that are treasured by Christians. Though I had heard several sermon series on Paul’s most famous letter and had read several books on the themes found within, it was during a great struggle in my prayer life that the words of Romans 8 fell afresh on me, opening up new steps and delights found in prayer.
Let’s briefly look at Romans 8 verses 1-2, and 14-16.
Romans 8:1-2
There is a lot loaded in the word “therefore”, as it is the turning point in Paul’s discourse building on chapters 1-7 (I suggest revisiting these chapters if they are unfamiliar or cloudy in your mind).
Paul writes that there is no condemnation for those who were once the enemies of God if they now are in (or belong to) Christ.* For those once lost but now found, the guilty sentence and guilty conscience no longer define us, but have passed from us to Christ. Not only has our guilt been cleared by Christ on the cross, His perfect beauty and goodness now belong and are shared with us. When God the Father sees us, He sees Christ, and when the Father smiles on the beloved Son He also smiles on us as we are Christ’s beloved brothers and sisters indwelt by the Holy Spirit.
* That “in Christ language” is huge, and we do not have time to discuss it here, though I will recommend two books below that have greatly impacted my walk with Jesus-- Dane Ortlund’s Deeper and Rankin Wilbourne’s Union with Christ
Romans 8:14-16
Verses 14-16 connect the dots between being in Christ and prayer. Verse 14 reinforces verses 1 and 2, saying those in the Spirit are true sons of God. Verse 15 contrasts this “Spirit of adoption as sons” with a spirit of slavery and fear. Slavery and fear of what? Slavery to sin, and fear of condemnation. When we are true sons, in the Spirit, beloved by God, we need not fear condemnation, but can cry out in the intimate language of “Abba! Father!”.
If we work backward through the verses we have looked at, we can see that the great hindrance to true fellowship with God in prayer is condemnation. “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”, and we “have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, ‘Abba! Father!’”.
The chapter ends by teaching us that even when we don’t know what to say, the Spirit within us speaks on our behalf, and that those who are in Jesus need not fear famine, danger, sword, because God is for us. No condemnation equals being counted as a child in the family of God, and is the foundation of prayer.
If we approach prayer as in any position other than children coming to a loving Father we will cower in fear, trying to earn the favor that has already been given to us, and never feel thewarm affection of God towards us in Christ.
The Purpose of Prayer
There are many reasons to pray, but after reorienting prayer around our place in God’s family we need to reconsider why we pray and see if it guides how we pray.
The night before writing this I was babysitting my three nephews, one in elementary school, the other in preschool, and the youngest an infant. Before being left alone with the three little rascals, I was given clear instructions on food preparation, what activities and games to play, what kinds of movies or shows we could watch, and most importantly— feeding the baby a bottle.
When dinner time came, the three kids and I had very different experiences with eating. I had called in a carry out order to pick up on the way over. The oldest helped make his own dinner. The preschooler was able to ask me for help, which I gladly obliged. The youngest though, neither able to dial a phone, order a sandwich, pay with a credit card, make his own dinner, or ask for help, had only one option—he looked at me and cried, and I knew exactly what he meant.
When the oldest said “I can get my own”, my only response was “great, thank you” with little other thoughts or feelings in the matter. When the middle child asked for help, my response was “of course”, and we had a good laugh trying to air fry taquitos. But when the infant cries, something different occurs. The heart is moved, not just the hands.
The response of one who loves and cares for a baby is not robotic, stiff, and routine. When a baby cries around dinner time, the caregiver already knows the need, yet affection goes out and the heart swells as the request is granted. This is exactly why we pray.
We don’t pray because God doesn’t know what is going on in His world. We also don’t pray to remind Him of promises that He might have forgotten about. Why pray? We pray because He wants to hear from us.
Prayers that go something like “Hey God, thanks for providing all these good gifts, we appreciate that” that have a mindset of “I can take it from here” is a sign of misunderstanding why we pray and how our relationship with God in Christ is the foundation of prayer.
Prayers that say “I need some help, I cannot reach that on my own” but are backed up with “now that things are back on my level I can handle it” may be a sign of prayer moving in the right direction, but still do not grasp at the relationship that allows for prayer.
No, the true prayer of the Christian that understands how a relationship with God begins and is carried through in Jesus sounds more like an infant crying for food. Prayers that cry out “Only you can satisfy my needs and desires, only you can provide, only you can calm my soul, only you can lift me out of the darkness” is like the prayer described in Romans 8:26 “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.”
The sweet moments of prayer come when we realize that God not only provided the food, but it is His hand that is “holding the bottle” and His finger that we wrap our little hands and hearts around.
Why pray? Because Christ died on your behalf so that you could laugh, cry, and smile in your Father’s arms.
Prayer in Practice
In conclusion I would like to add a few practices of prayer that have helped me greatly. Some have come through articles, podcasts, or being discipled by others. I do not know where each practice originated from, but know that nothing here is original to me.
#1- Make prayer part of your routine. If prayer is not a habit, reach out to a fellow church member or nearby Christian and ask for help in making prayer the most important part of your daily routine.
#2- Read A Praying Life. Paul Miller’s classic on prayer has had the greatest impact on my prayer life. Thank you to my friend John who encouraged me to pick it up when I told him about my struggles in prayer. It is my aim to read it every winter break.
#3- Regularly pause and acknowledge the presence of God. While I cannot recall where I first learned this, I can say that listening to the way N.T. Wright talks about prayer and prays on podcasts or in sermons has greatly helped me. It has become my regular practice in the morning, afternoon, evening, and then any time of day when I feel overwhelmed, to stop, take a deep breath, and then simply pray something like this “Father, thank you for being here with me and loving me. Thank you for Jesus, His life, example, death, and resurrection. Holy Spirit, I acknowledge your presence within me, and I ask that I would speak and act in ways that cause others to find Jesus loving and true.”
#4- Pray the Psalms. The most prayerful people I know have spent considerable time in the Psalms, reading them and then praying them. I have found this practice immensely helpful as it gives me the words to speak when I am unsure of how to express what I am feeling.
Resources on Prayer
1 Paul E. Miller A Praying Life
4 John Piper Are We Adopted for Us or for God? (Sermon)
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